UIBE @ 2010-02-09T01: 25:00
centuries ago since I read a fic, or anything. and today I feel a little conflicted.
turns out that my ... nana (which is rather my grandmother, only with another type of blood) is terminally ill. We're (me especially) watching the best we can. I feel bad for her, was always self-sufficient, demanding and very, very bossy, active and all that ... and it is not even a trace of anything like that. no longer wants to eat almost anything, practically lives medicines alone.
This aferradisima to life, but I think that no effort and do not have to do it is a losing battle, I see no evil death, I would like to take him, so you can go more peacefully.
and I feel bad because they seem to want to die, but what I is that I do not feel bad. Renal failure. have diabetes since I can remember and never care, lived and wanted all the time, going to travel, partying, drinking, eating and doing what I wanted when I wanted. it hurts me to see so, so I want to ... that. there is no way that you do a transplant, so age ... it hurts me not want to leave but do not live or unpoquito well. is tired all the time, no leaves, no longer walks ...
think not only guess that what it takes to die is being alive.
and sometimes I think it wrong to want (and do) forget it at times. I love her but also I have my life and I feel guilty about it, she does not understand, is still very demanding, selfish would say others. Also been prescribed Prozac, and from taking it and not cry. is an improvement, but I think more for us than for her. Estiy
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